The Rushing River

These words were written by a Mother as she was attempting to comfort another newly bereaved Mother at the loss of her son. 

~written by JoAnn Farrell~

I thought this morning about where you are and where I am in all this.  I feel it’s like I’ve been thrown into a rushing river.  At first it is DARK and I can only come up for air enough to keep from dying.  Then as the days go on, I feel rocks or the bottom bumping against my feet, but I can’t get any footing.  I keep on going under, gasping for air, then for a moment my feet feel the bottom and I can brace myself for a few moments.  Each time this happens, I can stand longer, but each time I get swept off my feet again.  

Then I notice each time that I stand, I can take a step toward the shore.  I am going to get pulled under a lot of times before I reach the shore, but I will make it…..I have to.  If not for me……for my family.  The one thing that I don’t know, is do I ever get to step out of the river?  I have a feeling that I will always walk along the shore with water to my ankles, occasionally falling into a hole.  Because I will never not miss my son.  But I will be able to stand and breathe.  

I am sure that I will fall into a deep hole occasionally as I walk the bank of the river, but God will take my hand and help me out.  I will be able to feel joy again…..love again….and do the things that God has for me to do.

I would guess that you are still gasping for breath…..and I am beginning to feel some footing.  We will make it…..it is just hard swallowing so much water…..and I miss my baby.