Preparing for Mothers Day - Part 6 of 9

WHAT GRIEVING MOMS WANT FOR MOTHER'S DAY  ~~   TheComfortCompany.net Offers 10 Simple Ways to help Moms Cope When Mother's Day Hurts - www.thecomfortcompany.net

Acknowledgement is what grieving mother's want most for Mother's Day - Many people don't knwo how to help a grieving mom - we hope these suggestions will help, but remember most Mothers will ask "Recognize that I am a mother".

“While Mother's Day is generally considered to be a day of celebration, for many women it is a day of pain and loss” says Renee Wood, former social worker and founder of The Comfort Company. "It's important to remember those moms who have had a failed pregnancy or who have lost a child at any age."

In response to the survey results, thecomfortcompany.net issued this list of ten simple ways to reach out to a grieving mother on this difficult holiday.

1. Recognize that they are a mother: Offer a hug and a "Happy Mother's Day". Send a card to let them know you remember they are a mother even though their child is not with them physically.
2. Acknowledge they have had a loss: Express the message, "I know this might be a difficult day for you. I want you to know that I am thinking about you.”
3. Use their child's name in conversation: One mother responded, "People rarely speak his name anymore, but when they do it’s like music to my ears".
4. Plant a living memorial: A tree or rose bush, like memories, will grow in beauty as the years pass.
5. Visit the grave site: Many mothers felt that it was "extremely thoughtful" when others visited their child's grave site and left flowers or a small pebble near the headstone.
6. Light a candle: Let the mother know you will light a candle in memory of their child on Mother's Day.
7. 
   Share a memory or pictures of the child: Give the gift of a memory. One mother wrote that the "greatest gift you can give is a heart felt letter about my child and a favorite memory with them".
8. Send a gift of remembrance: Many mothers felt a small gift would be comforting. Suggestions included: an angel statue, jewelry, a picture frame, a library book or toy donation in the child’s name or anything personalized.
9. Don't try to minimize the loss: Avoid using any clichés that attempt to explain the death of a child. ("God needed another angel.") Secondly, don't try to find anything positive about the loss ("You still have two healthy children").
10. Encourage Self-Care: Self-care is an important aspect of the "healing the mind and spirit effort" according to several mothers. Encourage a grieving mother to take care of herself. Give her a gift certificate to a day spa or any place where she can be pampered.