TEARS, TALK, TIME, AND TOMORROWS

~ By Debbie Landsman

I never thought I could go on living when you died, but…….I did.
I never thought I would survive after burying you, but……I did.
I never thought I’d get through those first days, weeks, months, but…….I did.
I never thought I’d be able to endure the first anniversary of your death, but….I did.
I never thought I’d let myself love my new grandchild, but…..I have.
I never thought tomorrow would be different, but…….it was.
I never thought I’d stop crying for a day, but…….I have.
I never thought the pain would ‘soften’, but it has.
I never thought I’d care if the sun shone again, but……I do.
I never thought I’d ever entertain again, but….I have.
I never thought I’d be able to control my grief, but…..I can.
I never thought I could function without medication again, but…..I can.
I never thought I’d smile again, but…..I do.
I never thought I’d laugh out loud again, but…..I do.
I never thought I’d look forward to tomorrow, but…..I do.
I never thought I’d reconcile your death, but…..I have.
I never thought I’d be able to create that ‘new normal’, but I have.
I never thought I’d be able to go on living after you died, but…..I do…….

Always missing you, always loving you, and thinking of you daily with a smile on my face….
And tears on my heart.